Tokum Mall at the end of her sight, she'd make it there but it meant missing her train. Tokum Mall was the only place that listened to her weeps without judgment. It had always been her cave. She needed it like a Martian did. She had never really gone through the array of dealing with disappointment like the way most women handle it. She had always achieved the best in whatever she pursued in her earlier years. Talk about how she consecutively won the national spelling B 3 years straight during high school. Why not? She was a vigorous reader too. She had flipped the Merriam-Webster dictionary pages back to back 5 times. Or how she almost made it to the Olympics if not for her preference to stay dedicated to her academics to pursue a real career. This is the real Lucy, she'd taken every opportunity to excel professionally but now for the first time in her life, she felt lost in her pursuit.
It was a chaotic Friday evening as always. She could see the orange sun drop behind Tokum Mall from afar. The long shadows from the city's imposing skyscrapers always gave a night sensation to the pool of the dwellers therein. Her stare was broken by the train's distant hoot. She turned around and made her way through the crowds struggling towards the train stage. It always felt like survival for the fittest. She reflected on this struggle with how she has always been approaching life. Perhaps things had to change now. It's not hard work or passion perhaps. It's a dirty fight. But Lucy wasn't dirty enough. All her interview counterparts had secured their jobs. Frank had been on the interview panel. That's why losing out on this job didn't make sense to her. He wasn't really after competence. It was Lucy's only chance and he reversed it, at least until she could gives in. Lucy would rather lose the job offer. But for this particular job, she didn't know if she had made the right choice turning it down. It could literally change her life.
Like always, she managed to get onto the train easily. Her petite slender body always allowed for that and she always comfortably maneuvered through the overwhelming crowd more swiftly than her oversized counterparts. In Kanak, 40% of the adult population was overweight. At least not her she was thankful. Perhaps that's the reason she chose to sit next to a medium-sized young man. It would be a more spacious ride home than usual. Besides, she did need the space. Nobody really minded the other in Kanak, even their immediate neighbors on the train. They would just sit and put on their airpods immediately. It was a dead community, a cold society. She'd have to bear the rest of the journey staring at everyone like a dummy as she had lost her airpods. She noticed her neighbor quietly reading a Spanish book. She hadn't the strength then to even say "Hola" like usual. Besides that was all her Spanish, and the subway norms wouldn't allow for that anyways.
'You envy them too, right?' Her neighbor's ice-breaker shocked her for a second so she turned to give him a look as if to say, "I dare you to say a word to me again" Perhaps the books he had read had taught him to read faces too so he responded, " the old couple over there, you haven't taken your gaze off them."
"No, I'm not even looking at them." she denied.
"Well I do, and I think you do too, haha. I see the way you looking at them" The stranger was now going overboard. It was very unusual to speak to just anyone in Kanak, especially on the train. However, the man next to her seemed to be all comfortable with it. His accent wasn't all that Kanakan too. He obviously wasn't Kanakan no matter how much he looked like one of them.
"Where are you from?" she asked.
"I'm from Kanaka but I lived in France most of my life?" he answered, comfortably.
"So how are you reading a Spanish book?"
"oh, this is actually Italian. Kanaka was colonized by Italy. Daaa!'
"Sorry, no one speaks that here anymore. at least for the last 30 years as far as I know from my high school history."
Then it went on and on. Mini debates, laughs, roasts, they even shared a chocolate she had bought before she boarded. It was a perfect moment, therapeutic perhaps. for her especially. she needed this. They joked about the broken hinge of the eyeglasses of the old man across and how their love life must have been so perfect to last that long and how his old Compagne wasn't minding such graphic flaws.
"Their love must have been at first sight, for sure," he said
"No, must've started in World War I, II, or something like that. Coz how doesn't he not mind the bald patches in her hair. They must have gone through a lot. They look so lovely."
"Too good to be true though"
That's the statement that brought her back to reality. After she got off the train, she immediately deleted his number. Like her mother always said, "The bigger the city, the more skeptical you should be and the friendlier, the deadlier." The stranger seemed nice but her mother's caution reigned over his cute, friendly tone. It now obviously sounded more deadly. Right after she deleted the stranger's number, her phone suddenly rang. She saw the caller's number. It was Frank. Her heart tightened. His number was unsaved but she knew it from the number of times he had called over the months. She immediately relaxed and picked up the phone call in a confrontational manner, as if he were in front of her that moment, leaning on one leg, extending the other away from her center to the left, and moving the fist of her other hand up her waistline, she started in a sharp tone, "What do you want now, Frank?"
The voice on the other end of the phone almost shuttered her to death, she couldn't feel her legs, her body all went weak and she dropped to her knees as if she'd had a heart attack. She could still hear Frank laugh sarcastically through her mobile. She wept silently, her eyes immediately turned and flooded with tears. She looked helplessly in the middle of the street to her apartment block. It was 8pm, and the streets were almost empty. The Venusian in her had easily popped out at this moment.
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